The Pig Trotters

Just had lunch at the hawker centre. Sat near the Malay food section and shared a table with a Malay couple, estimated to be in their early twenties. Then a Chinese hawker carrying two bowls of rice and a bowl of pig trotters in black sauce walked by, looking for his customer. Malay guy raised his hands to signal the hawker over, I almost fell off the chair.

I spend the next 30 minutes trying to make sense of this Malay couple feasting on some animal parts with toe nails. I don't know how they can eat that, I don't even want to try even if I am on Fear Factor. Its all fats and hair surrounding a tiny piece of flesh, looks more like a unemployed transvestite's legs to me. Can't imagine how pigs live with all that without getting heart attacks and bypass. I wanted to tell the couple it's easier to swallow a block of lard with butter.

Talking about lard, I just learned that lard is used in making some perfumes. Yes, perfume!!! I don't know which genius came up with the idea or who actually saw the potential. I think maybe some bloody butcher was working in the abatoir slaughtering and chopping up meat when suddenly he caught a whiff of Chanel No.5 from some pig's armpit or earlobes .. maybe that's how it all started.

Anyway, I thought Malays are not suppose to booze, no pork, no gambling and just circumcise and ride motorbikes? Maybe they are not Malays? But these two are too fair to be Indians and too dark to be Chinese. I started to look for some indications. They had the helmets, which is good sign, the Levis jeans, the Marlboros and were obviously enjoying the heavy metal music in the background, so a fairly good chance I am right about the race.

The only possiblity of a mistaken identity was perhaps the religion factor. Not all Filipinas are maids and so not all Malays are Muslims. Not all Chinese kids past Chinese exams and not all Americans can write in English.

So I suppose Malays are allowed to eat pig trotters then. Just make sure the nails are not painted ..

Go Mat Power!