The Greeting

Was walking across to Parkway when I met a parent with her son. Sometimes for that split second your words seemed to have frozen in your brain and you can't think of anything nice to say. You thought of saying a simple 'Hi' but then you thought this person deserve a little more than a hi because the last time you met them, you had a good session talking about the weather. I knew I was going say something but the words just got bumped at the teeth. Its too late to turn away because they are already walking towards you. Then out of desperation, I looked at what she was carrying, then I blurted out:
" wah, buy so much toilet paper ah !!!? "

I think for that moment the mother must have felt like strangling me. Nothing can be more embarressing than being spotted in public for carrying loads of that shit paper around! I suppose that parent would not know how to react either. I don't know about everyone else, but I do feel a little uncomfortable carrying bags of toilet paper around. I usually buy them at the nearest shop and quickly load them into the car, like some contraband goods. There is this strange awkward feeling about carrying toilet paper around, unlike say flowers. You will be beaming with pride when you are carrying flowers. But not toilet paper. Thats why the toilet rolls manufacturers try to help by disguising the bag a little, maybe add some pictures of birds or windmill on the plastic bags, make them look like you are carrying soap powder or something.

But if you are carrying stacks of photocopying paper around, it would be very different. Still paper, but different reactions cos different usage. "wa, buy so much writing paper ah? " " ya lor, got a lot of projects to do! " Different response, different feel but same thing from the tree.

Occasionally I do get offbeat greetings from people. Like when I am all dressed up ready to get out for work, I am locking my door and my elderly neighbour sees me and he would say,

"Going out?"

"No I am just practising locking doors because I am bored to death"

10 hours later I get home and I am at the door and the same neighbour sees me again,

" Just got home?"

" No, I am still practising locking and unlocking doors!"

This man's dictionary for greetings is really limited. No hi or hello, just those two lines. And he is not looking for answers to his questions, neither is he interested in what you have to say. Just ways to break the ice and then get rid of you, I think.

Same for my office cleaning lady. I think her family owns some restaurant business. Everytime she sees me she goes " Have you eaten? " in Chinese. And that would be her standard greeting for the rest of her career here. Then I will be sitting there and wondering when was the last time I ate ... real good question.