The Air Stewardess

A former student came by this afternoon for a visit. She was here 6 years ago and now she has just graduated from NUS with a major in Japanese language. From a playful Sec 4 student to a playful young adult. Time really flies.
 
She had just came back from a one month work stint plus holiday in Japan. Apparently NUS has an intern program to place students for overseas training. In her case, she was attached to a Japanese Bank in Hiroshima. She got so imressed by the Jap culture and people that she has applied to be a air stewardess with Japan Airline! And she has beaten 200 applicants to be one of the 15 chosen to fly with JAL. The interview was not easy she said. Took her almost a month of testing and interviews to finally get the job.
 
The Japanese are so strict and tough with the people they pick. Your hair has to be really black and your complexion must be good, if not, perfect. They want this pure non contaminated Asian look. I think if I had applied I would have failed miserably. The only part of my body that meets this criteria of extreme black hair and perfect complexion is my backside and my …. Seriously, for me to go for the interview, I would have to strip and bend over. That way they only see the blackest and fairest.

And you cannot be tanned and must be pleasant looking or pretty. Sounds more like a chauvinistic beauty contest if you ask me. No wonder the Japanese men find it hard to control themselves on board after a few glasses of whisky. I mean who can resist if you keep selecting stewardesses of Miss Universe calibre. 

There was one question which was however quite puzzling. She said she has to fly from Singapore to USA via Japan quite often. As such the different time zones would mean many changes to sleep and meals. Which poses one big problem: when you have breakfast here then fly to the USA and you reach there 16 hours later but in the morning. Do you still have breakfast there or dinner??! Another Einstein question ..

But I think the Singapore government would be jumping up and down if they hear that our local graduates are becoming air stewardesses instead of more ‘professional’ use your brain work. The amount of subsidy for education from Primary to University is enormous for a child here. I have nothing against people in the airline industry, but when you think of the air stewardess’s job as someone who serves coffee and look pretty in mid-air, you cannot help but feel the pain for the taxpayers.

The same for the pilots. I once met a British Airway pilot and I asked him what is the most difficult part about flying a plane. He said it’s the taking off and the landing. Other than these two functions, most of the navigation and flying is done by the ‘auto pilot’! I then asked him why not we ‘auto’ all the way and cut cost on the four pilots per plane. The British guy walked away without saying goodbye.  Guess I must have touched a sensitive issue here. But technology is so advanced now, can't they make a plane take off and land on its own? I dont think it's that difficult considering they have invented the remote control for almost everything now .. e.g the remote control for the clock.

What do they do while the plane is on autopilot?? They just sit around and hang around, occasionally telling you the weather and the altitude on the outside with that sleepy microphonic voice. Who on earth would be interested in the weather outside the plane 50000 metres above ground??? Any chance of you stepping outside the plane for a chat or a breath of fresh air??! Or in case you have to jump off the plane in a hurry you could bring along an umbrella for the cloudy sky?? If I want the weather report I just have to look out of the window!

And they always like to wish you a pleasant journey. No, don't wish me anything, just make sure you fly to the place stated on my air ticket. That would be good enough for me.